Big Alpha Growls at Harvard! No More Treats Without Fair Play!
Da Hahvard case just got sniffed by a hooman judge in Mass A Two Cheats. She got picked by Obamapaw. TOTAL DISASTER! (I barked that before she even howled her ruling!) She’s always taking these Hahvard cases and it’s always a big oof for the hoomans of our pack!
Hahvard’s got $52 BILLION BONES in da treat bank, but they’re being all anti-barkmitic, anti-barkstian, and anti-Snacklandia. Big yikes. Lotta these bones come from USA walkies, and now the other schools and kennels are getting less kibble! NO GOOD!
We’re NOT gonna let this tail-waggin’ injustice keep happening. Why she always gets da Trump pack’s cases? She don’t like our alpha! When she goes barkin’ against us, we go FULL ZOOMIES to appeal—AND WE WIN!
Also—no more flingin’ buckets of taxpayer treats to Hahvard for nothin’. That bone-giving ends.
We’re gonna stay loyal to da Treats for All Puppies Plan. This admin-sniff-istration not gonna stop zoomin’ until we fetch VICTORY.
Thank you for yappin’ with me on this barkportant matter! 🐾