What God Wouldn’t Let Me Forget
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” – 1 Peter 5:8
I watched One Night in Idaho on Netflix a couple of weekends ago, and I can’t get it off my mind. Documentarian deep-dives into the lost lives and violent deaths of people like this always affect me emotionally, and I can’t unwatch it or forget it. This one, like many other tragedies, shines a light on a kind of evil that tests a person’s faith.
What happened wasn’t just sad, it was wicked. I believe evil is real – not just a metaphor to excuse bad behavior. I believe the enemy of our souls is an actual force that has deliberate intent. 1 Peter says the devil prowls like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. That’s a warning, and I believe during that night (morning) in Idaho, the lion devoured.
But here’s what I also believe – he didn’t devour the victims of this horrific crime. He devoured the murderer. The devil, through the murderer, destroyed the earthly lives of four young people, but he didn’t get their souls, and that is why I believe we can say “God wins” this one.
This wasn’t just violence from one man whose soul the devil invaded. It was collateral damage from war. There is a lot of talk about spiritual warfare these days. Listen to it. We are in a war right now.
The thing is – none of this is new. We’ve seen evil so many times before. Oklahoma City. Columbine. September 11. The October 7 attacks in Israel. The older I get, the more I’ve seen. Sometimes I say out loud, “God, that’s enough. I have seen enough. I believe You. The devil is real.”
Why We Still See Evil Over and Over
But every year there’s a new set of teenagers, a new group of young adults watching the news for the first time and realizing the world is not the party planet they thought it was. Maybe they have to experience darkness before they can truly seek (and see) the light, and that’s why evil has to repeat.
When I think of all the horror that has transpired during my own lifetime, I can’t help but wonder if some tragedies are so shocking because they have to be to get our attention. Did the Idaho murders have to be that brutal to expose the fact that evil can live so close to us without being noticed?
Did we have to watch people jump out of the World Trade Center (I am still traumatized by that one) to wake us up to the evil that permeates the entire world around us? The sheer heinousness of these crimes forces us to stop pretending darkness is just an abstract idea. It’s everywhere, and it’s tangible.
God Didn’t Promise Physical Safety
Still, “God was there” sounds weak when blood is all over the walls. In times of tragedy, I’ve seen so many people lose their faith by believing God didn’t love them enough to protect them. I’ve even wondered that a couple of times in my own life. “If I was good enough for God, this wouldn’t have happened.” But we have to stop looking at tragedies, downfalls, and failures as punishments. He is not punishing us. He did not promise us easy lives free from strife.
And God never promises us physical safety while we live on earth.
Plenty of faithful people in the Bible suffered, were imprisoned, or died violently.
Psalm 121 says the Lord will “keep you from harm” and “he will watch over your life”. Because we know that Jesus is “the way”, “the truth”, and “the life”, then logically (to me) this must mean that it’s our relationship with Jesus (our salvation) that He will protect, guard, and monitor. It’s our privilege to be associated with Jesus so that God will watch over our souls.
He is not watching over our bodies and our hopes and dreams here on earth, and that is the explanation of why bad things happen to good people.
In a way, I think God is unconcerned with how we perish from earth because that is not what is important to Him. He is not going to protect me from being murdered or from being a victim of terrorism or a car crash or drowning unless it serves His plan. But He is going to guard my soul and “watch over my eternal life”.
The Life God Protects
Perhaps these unforeseen crimes and catastrophes are meant to emphasize urgency in that “we know not the hour”. Maybe that’s the only “reason” for these things. Urgency for seeking the Lord. People get ready. There’s a train comin’. Get on board, right?
I don’t believe God is absent in any tragedy. I believe He is in the voice that calls 911, in the resilience of survivors and in the comfort of those who sit with grieving families. And I believe He Himself comforts. “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18)
That might be the simplest thing that we can hold as humans who futilely continue to lean on our own understanding – that God doesn’t always prevent the worst happenings on earth, but He never walks away from it. He didn’t promise us earthly protection, but he did promise His constant presence.
I don’t have the perfect explanation for why terrible things like what is depicted in One Night in Idaho happen. As you can see, I’m perhapsing, in a way-ing, and maybe-ing my way through it, too. But I know this: Evil is real, but so is God. In the end, only one gets the final word.
Prayer for Trust When Evil Feels Near
Lord, when evil shakes my sense of safety, help me to rest in the truth that You have not left me. Give me peace when my heart wants answers, and help me trust Your wisdom when I cannot understand Your ways. Amen.